At the age of 31 I was in really bad shape. I had been an alcoholic for 13 years, depressed for four, I hadn’t had a job in ages and I lived with my grandmother. I went through life in a haze where I constantly blamed all my failures and shortcomings on others.
By pure chance I was one day offered to buy ten hits of LSD. I bought it thinking that it would offer yet another way for me to escape. Had the dealer offered me opium, amphetamine or something else I would most likely also have said yes, because I wasn’t to worried with what I took, as long as I got wasted.
That weekend my friends and I drove out to an isolated farm. None of us really knew what to expect. At that time I had no idea what a chakra was. I did not even know the word.
A couple of hours after we took the acid my throat chakra opened up wide and from my neck a beam of energy shot straight out into the universe and connected me to everything. That allowed me to move outside myself, up the beam and observe.
When I saw myself from the outside, I saw that all the pain, all the sorrow, all the failures that I carried around and projected on other people, were in fact my own creations. The realization was that I truly created my own life. And just as I can create fog and pain and anger, I can choose to create clarity, liberation and harmony.
In that moment, I chose a different path. It required no effort, it was like turning on a light. Once I did so I no longer needed to think about it, because the light was lit. I chose to take control of my life again. I chose to take responsibility for my life and for my choices. I decided to sober up and begin to clear out the fog and the pain that blinded and enslaved me.
Then and there a new chapter of my life began. Three months later I was sober, on the road to recovery from my depression, I had a job and an apartment.
Since then I have worked intensly with my personal and spiritual development, assisted others in doing the same, solved three more addictions, found my shamanic path and changed careers. I have found joy, new friends, a family and have two wonderful children. I have worked with LSD, mushrooms and San Pedro, and have accumulated a wide range of techniques to work with myself and others.
Read about all this and much more on my blog: http://wilby.nu/
Unfortunately, due to the prohibition I can’t be sure about the substance I’d be getting, or from the people I’d be getting it from. I’ve read so many amazing stories from scientists, and psychiatrists about the amazing wonders it has done for everyone from businessmen to curing schizophrenic children. Now what state is ready to experiment on legalizing this one?
It is true that prohibition makes it harder to trust the substances, since there is no control. But substances are more or less likely to be tampered with, and my experience is that LSD is one where it is much less likely. One reason is that psychedelics are still to a large extent produced and handled by enthusiasts. Another is that it is hard to mask anything else as LSD, since LSD is such a very powerful substance that the dose is tiny.
I find that the greatest problems with LSD is 1) knowing that it is fresh, and 2) knowing the dose. The only way for me to find out is to try it.
Oddly enough, the founder of Alcoholics Anonymous, Bill Wilson, had a very similar experience while being treated at Towns Hospital with a psychedelic plant mixture known back then as the Belladonna Cure. Without that experience, 12-Step recovery probably wouldn’t exist today.