Over the past two years I’ve become a big follower and advocate of the Joe Rogan Experience (JRE) podcast. I found out about Joe Rogan through his commentary on The Ultimate Fighting Championship. Little did I know at the time that this one person’s influence was going to drastically change my whole life and belief system in one fell swoop.
On the JRE podcast Joe has a wide spectrum of guests from many different professions and walks of life. It’s a really great way to broaden ones horizons in the comfort of wherever you may be and for me this kind of endeavor really signifies the collective change in people’s information gathering aided and abetted by the glorious internet. From Graham Hancock with his alternative version of ancient civilizations and history to Alex Grey the phenomenal psychedelic-influenced artist, the guests on each episode are the type of people who undeservingly don’t get the mainstream media attention they deserve.
Before my introduction to JRE, I was a self proclaimed atheist and a procurer of the scientific approach to life — a real disciple of the Richard Dawkins school of thought. I even walked around with a copy of The God Delusion, well at least while I was reading it. I had been to India and spent time in Goa hanging out with the hippies and was completely adamant that I was probably the least spiritual person there. Yeah, I’d give yoga a go, but don’t expect me to sit in the lotus position for hours on end searching for transcendency and a higher state of conscious awareness. Especially when there are hot ladies knocking around — let’s get our priorities straight here! As I ploughed through more and more episodes of JRE, I became accustomed to this underlying message that Joe kept on banging on about: DMT!
DMT is a psychedelic substance that is produced by the nervous system and released into the blood stream every night in small doses as we sleep. It is hypothesized that this is where our dreams emanate from. Also a larger dose is released when we die, giving the drug its alternative name ‘The Spirit Molecule.’ Not only do we, as humans, carry the receptors to process this molecule, but it is also found within other mammals. It is hypothesized that it emanates from the pineal gland in human beings, but as of yet this is unproven due to the limited research carried out in the field. DMT is also found within plants and it seems that this substance has a strong role for all life in general and has been instrumental in our evolution and existence. But what its actual purpose is remains a mystery to the academic science community.
In the Amazon, ancient tribes make the chemical by combining a plant with a vine to produce the DMT compound. It is said that the brew, named ayahuasca, has been in existence for at least 2000 years. When spiritual healers known as shaman were asked how this concoction was discovered they say, “The plants told us.”
You cannot deny the mystique and fascination that surrounds this story, but the real magic lies in the profound effects and strangely similar accounts and experiences that people have on the drug: Self reflection, ego humbling, life altering — a game changer! Just some of the statements that are consistent between DMT/ayahuasca debutants.
DMT is not only the most potent psychedelic experience known to man, but it’s also the most educational too. People seeing themselves stripped of their ego and their justifications for their own insecurities and fallacies are only too common within the realm of DMT. These visions and messages that are communicated are not only tailored to each individual but leave you with a clear path of positive self revolution and some would say soul cleansing.
So basically we have a drug here that cuts your ego down to size and leaves you with a strong personal message which in turn makes you a better person!
‘Where can I get some of this?’ I thought
[Cuts to walking out of an old warehouse with a bag of DMT in hand.]
I think with DMT, it’s not about when you can get hold of it, it’s more a case of when you’re ready it will find you. At least this is how I felt when it presented itself to me.
Erkan, a close friend of 27 years ever since we randomly sat together on the first day of secondary school, would be my co-conspirator for today’s journey into the unknown. I’d even done all the preparation and gone to Camden to collect a spanking new pipe with gauze and a lighter. I’d also watched a few YouTube videos to make sure I knew how to smoke and prepare this strange yellow powdered substance I had just bought for £100. Yes, this may sound expensive, but I already felt like I’d just made the most value for money purchase in my life and I hadn’t even tried it yet!
Let’s face it, it’s not everyday you can travel through time and space to shift dimension through your consciousness. I’d already decided I would go first. I felt no fear or trepidation to jump straight in head first. This was my destiny staring me straight in the face and I was ready to embrace the experience and the challenges that lay unbeknown to me on the table in this yellow powder currently being loaded by Erkan into the pipe.
One other key factor that I had addressed was to set the scene with DMT-appropriate music. That week I had just bought the new James Holden album Inheritors. It was as if everything was coming perfectly together without my doing. The stand out track “Blackpool Late Eighties” had DMT literally written all over it. Spooky, mystical but yet inspiring and uplifting. Erkan was ready to film the experience too. I guess this was potentially more harrowing for him as he had to wait and watch me first before he had to face the inevitable.
Ok. I’m ready. Let’s do this!
As I pull the pipe towards my lips Erkan places the lighter flame to the powder. I take a deep hit straight down deep into my lungs. As I inhale I see the powder turn into little droplets of liquid and then start to burn a glowing red. I had read ‘The Terrence McKenna method of administering DMT’ so I knew that there was a technique of getting enough smoke straight into the lungs so that the right amount of DMT could in turn enter the blood supply. Six seconds was long enough to hold in on the first hit before I exhaled the now depleted smoke and quickly readied myself for hit number two! As I took the second hit, I could feel something taking over my body. I was going… I was being taken.. My destiny awaited… I saw the walls of my reality melting away… “I’m going…” I said to Erkan. This was it.
As I entered I was faced immediately with a yellow, orange and golden geometric mandala. It was spiraling and evolving like it was a kaleidoscope on fire. I immediately knew this to be an entity of female gender. But not just any female; this was a goddess. How I knew this was unknown to me, but it seemed perfectly obvious at the time. And how she was communicating to me was irrelevant too. There was a higher state of communication that I had immediately taken to and without question was now participating in. She had something to show me.
As I stayed with her she diverted my attention to this instantly recognizable image. It was my girlfriend. But not an image of her like you would expect. It was her love! My girlfriend’s love for me that was burning so bright with its gaze and focus directed with pinpoint accuracy on myself. A big powerful ball of energy that I didn’t even have to question what it was. Maybe the goddess had told me but I felt like I just knew. It was too obvious to question. Then the goddess spoke: “Look at this! This is for you and for you only. Why dismiss it? Why look elsewhere anymore? Everything you need is right here.”
Now I was left in a dark purply blue space. Immediately out of the darkness two large-eyed entities came to greet me. They were shocking pink, which was a great contrast to the purply blue. They also had very large eyes which were widely set apart. I don’t remember what was communicated here, but I felt like we were just being inquisitive with each other and working each other out. I didn’t feel threatened or scared.
What a journey I was having! I think these were the elves Terence McKenna had spoke of.
All along I hadn’t lost my mind for one minute. I was in a new world with new laws and new physics, but I still had my mind intact and I wasn’t scared. I wasn’t in danger and I just had this overwhelming feeling of love and being cared for. I did though, have my rudimentary thought processes that are only appropriate and relevant in my other reality on earth. As I tried to implement these values into my experience, I kept on hitting a brick wall. I was going round in triangles trying to think my way around my new environment. Yes triangles, not circles, but triangles. And it wasn’t working. Every time I turned a corner of my triangular thought pattern, I was ridiculed and made fun of by the elves. They found it hilarious that I was going round in triangles and every turn of the triangle’s corner was met with an “Ahhh uh uh uh” — accompanied by a wag of the finger that signaled my recurring mistake much to the delight of the elves. At least I was able to see the funny side of things. My inexperience was causing a lot of humor and excitement to my new found audience.
It later became apparent to me that this was the moment the chemical was wearing off. I heard Erkan’s voice before my eyes opened. He sensed I was coming around. “Here he is… Are you back? What was it like? Talk to me Seb…” Just some of the words I was being bombarded with on my arrival back to the old reality.
I tried to talk but I couldn’t say a word. It literally felt like a lifetime of information had just entered my brain. “Talk to me Seb.” As I tried to talk I realized I didn’t know what I wanted to say. “Come on Seb, say something.” In my mind I just remember thinking somebody shut Erkan the fuck up.
I’m still enjoying this shit. So much to take stock of. So much to compute. How do I put this into words?
Eventually I did come round and give Erkan as good an account as I’ve just given you. In a way, it was probably harder for my old school friend to see my shivering fragile body curl up into almost fetal position as the psychedelic trance snatched my spirit away. Those seven minutes or so were an eternity for both of us. At least I’d had a positive experience. I felt completely overwhelmed and consumed by emotions I almost cried.
I remember being surprised at how little time I’d been gone. In DMT land, time seems irrelevant and unnecessary. If seven minutes seems like two hours, what must four hours on ayahuasca feel like, I thought.
In the coming days after my first experience my mind was awash with the infinity of questions that DMT leaves you with. The question of what reality really is has been pondered over by great philosophers and even simple men for an eternity. After DMT this important question is as omnipresent as ever. Having that tangible experience in the bag is invaluable to this mindset and I’ve really started to question if the reality we all live our human existence here on planet earth is but a mere simulation, or at least only part of a much greater picture. So many different hypothesis can’t be discounted because there is such a void in our understanding of what consciousness is and where it can take us. Even the great realms of knowledge that science holds fail to give us the answers. And maybe it never will. I have to admit, as crazy as it sounds, the idea of a spirit world where entities can guide us, or in some cases even misguide us, doesn’t seem so far fetched anymore.
The fact that a human being can have this potent, memorable and potentially life changing experience in the comfort of their own sitting room fascinates me. Even if the scientific standpoint is correct and DMT just allows your mind to create these parallel realities in your brain, then that’s still an amazing thing. That we can manifest the most beautiful complex geometrical and vivid dimensions, including other entities by simply increasing the amount of a chemical that already exists in our body.
Whichever way you look at it, I’m a changed man and 100 percent changed for the better.
I have a newfound respect and connection with nature. The world literally looks like a different place, more vivid and beautiful than ever. I also seem to be calmer and less erratic than usual. I have a rekindled passion for reading, and the works of Edgar Cayce, Rupert Sheldrake and Carl Jung have all been a byproduct of a new found quest for answers and knowledge that I feel has literally possessed my spirit. I’m placing much more importance on my relationships with friends new and old and I’ve definitely become more focused on my relationship with my girlfriend. That alone is a feat in itself after the way I’ve neglected her in the past.
We live in a crazy universe and after doing DMT I have a strong feeling nothing can be discounted. On the flip side, I wouldn’t say I’m all of a sudden about to join any religion or cult but I’m definitely much more open minded about things and more willing to adapt and challenge my opinions then ever before. The Universe has definitely spoken to me in a very personal way and I’m completely in awe of it’s complexities. But even greater than that, I have a strong sense of unconditional love that has revealed itself to me.
Something I never foresaw but will forever be thankful for.
Edited lightly for typos and clarity.